Long Time No See!

So here's why no posting in a while (three main reasons):

1. (Say this in an old-lady-smoker-brooklynite voice)
My Sciatica is Killing Me!
But actually it's way better now, on account of me doing lots of funny back exercises and simultaneous kegels (saves time). You ladies know what I am talking about!

2. The baby kicks me right under the ribs every time I sit up instead of leaning way back. This makes sitting at the computer tough. He is already grounded.

3. I have been back at work, and this has involved a lot of OCD-style organizing of a room where not a whole lot has been thrown away in the last century, from what I could tell. I went to the container store and bought 50 clear containers, and so did the other kindergarten teacher, and we could barely get them all in the car and let me tell you, I ran out of containers, that's how much organizing I am doing. I took every single thing off the shelves and out from under the sink and from every other place and I put about half of it in the hallway, and then the teacher who used to be in my room a few years ago came by and commented on how I was throwing away all her special things, but I have to believe she was joking, at least I choose to believe that, on account of she does have a real good sense of humor, and if she wanted any of that stuff she could have kept it, am I right? Anyway I should have taken some "before" shots, but here are some "during" and one of my obsessively organized shelves now. I'm almost done. By the time school starts I'll be dead of a heart attack.

Differently-Abled Comedians and Inappropriate Murals--My Big Night Out

So, my friends Emily and Laura have been watching "Last Comic Standing" a lot and are obsessed with this comedian who has cerebral palsy, Josh Blue, who is on the show. He was doing a show here in SF, and Emily had an extra ticket, and I was all, "I'm in!" You know the idea of a spastic comedian appeals to my sensibility! So we went, and he was semi-funny, I thought, but Laura and Emily were laughing so hard they were almost throwing up, which was really funny. Later, they got a celebrity shot with him, and you can see our friend, Rachel, was not quite that into getting her picture taken with him, hence her separation from the group.

Then we left the club and saw these upsetting murals, and I was all like, "Sweet Jesus! This would never fly in New York! Or at least he would be circumcised!"


























And then we saw this Sharpie car, which made me really happy and kind of made up for the upsettingness of the murals. Because, as many of you know, I just really love Sharpies.

Sciatica--It's Not Just for Grandmas Anymore!

So, here's the nicest, most fanciest addition to my wardrobe--my new pregnancy belt! I forgot to put on the top strap, which goes over the belly, for full photo effect. It's cute, right? My pal Beth (lover of Las Vegas) was here for a visit, and she took a photo from behind, as well, but I could not bear to post it, due to it making me look like I am perhaps growing the child in my butt.

Daddy's Buildin' Us a Guest Room!

This is so when you come visit you don't have to sleep with the baby or the cats, and the special couch will be here too, in case you want to sit on it, you can! If you are the kind of guest that needs to pee in the middle of the night, however, you will sleep upstairs and we'll put the baby somewhere else, maybe down here where we can't hear him cry. This room will have a lovely view of the garden, and easy access to the washer/dryer if you want to do some chores. I am not invited to the work area right now, due to my interruptive tendencies. In fact Evan has encouraged me to go see a movie, and why don't I go right now?

Let Me Tell You Some More Stuff About Vegas

It was so freaking hot. I had to go to the pool by 8:00 AM and leave by 11:00, which for me is a real tragedy because I am really more of a 10:00-6:00 pool person. But look how cute our drinks were! We stayed at Treasure Island (TI!) which is trying to slut-up its image, so they have this racy pirate/siren show outside, where one lady--she's the main slutty siren-- says, I am not kidding, "A lot of sea-men have swum up in my cove." I got the best photo I could of this one pirate guy in bondage, who from far-away looked just like Ari from Entourage, which greatly enhanced my enjoyment of the show. Then there was lots of fire, and fireworks! Whooh! It was the only show we saw (except for the fountains at the Bellagio, which we expressly visited in honor of my friend Beth, who LOVES Vegas, especially the Bellagio, although you would never guess that about her) on account of it was FREE.

Vegas, Baby, Vegas

Backing up about a month, my little brother got married in Vegas. I don't mind telling you that it was about a million degrees there. He got married at the Venetian which was so huge it took about half-an-hour just to walk through it. It was funny when they were taking wedding photos there were people in their bikinis just out of range of the camera. I tried to capture that on film but no dice. Isn't his wedding party glamorous? His bride wore dusty pink, which I though was very chic. He was nervous. Even though he denies it, he does admit that he thought he he might faint, but NOT 'cause he was nervous at all.

And check out my photo of the ladies in the family: my mom, my sister, and me. Hey, I also don't mind saying, check out my rack! And I was trying to be modest! The boob fairy has arriveth!

The Berla Clan

These are the Berlas. Kathy is my aunt, my mother's sister, and the other guys are my "Unca George" and my two cousins, Lucas and Corey. There's one other one, Jeremy, I think he's traveling somewhere. They are a very loving and close family, can't you tell by the way they are all gathered around the lemon? They live in Walnut Creek, in the East Bay, where it's like one million degrees right now, so they came to SF for some relief. We went for a walk at Ocean Beach, where, incidentally, we were very frightened by a raving lunatic homeless person in a wild fennel patch. Nothing bad happened to us, it was just a scare. Of course I left my camera in the car, so was unable to capture breathtaking veiws of the ocean and the GG Bridge, typical. The next time I go there all will be obsured by fog. Anyway, they all came over to check out the pad, and we gave them a lemon and some herbs. The second photo is a tip-of-the-hat to my mom, who really enjoys a still life.

VSP Maker Visits SF!

So, Alex Hadley, famous clay pot designer, came to vist SF with his family. They stopped by Alabama Street and we got a shot with the artist and his work.

The Original Julia

For those of you that don't know, my little sister is also named Julia. This is her at her graduation this May. Could she be any f-ing cuter?!! I love this girl. I cried like a baby at her graduation. Do you like that girl in the background with her mouth wide open? That's one of Julia's best friends. I bet she wouldn't appreciate this being on my blog. Oh well.

Julia, Continued

What can I say? I am totally obsessed with her! This is the day I became certain we are soulmates. I took her to her swimming lessons, and before we went in the pool, she put on her goggles and spontaneously started doing this crazy dance. I wish I would have been on my game, I would have taken a video clip!

My Niece Julia

This is her. She's three. I think we may share quite a bit of genetic material, because she's very fiery and sassy and both of her parents (my brother and his wife) are very easygoing folks. So I bought her this little watering can, because otherwise she insists on using the huge one and I am afraid she's going to drop it on her foot, and then she's have to go to the hospital, and it would be my fault, you know. So she's out there watering the plants, and I keep trying to take her picture, and she won't even look up at me, and then she says, "Sarah, I'm CONCENTRATING." Anyway she finally gave me one smile, just to shut me up. Note the chocolate ice cream on her mouth, that's not dirt, or worse. We went to Mitchell's ice cream earlier, and let me tell you, that's some good ice-cream, they have all kinds of bizarre flavors, like blue yam and avocado, but I get Mexican chocolate. Julia dropped her cone, and then she smiled ever-so-sweetly and said to me, "Sarah, I LOVE yours!" A chip of the old auntie-block.


Anyway, later she did some reading with Uncle Evan. He likes to imply that maybe she loves him better than she loves me, but that in no way should I feel bad about that. (jerk) But she really is crazy about him. Not that I'm jealous.

"Genius" Bar

Oh man, I don't have a photo for you but I am in the East Bay Apple Store, and I have to tell you, I'd rather die! So I am checking the blog to see if anyone besides me is reading it and I found a comment on the VSP post that if it came from a friend is amusing, and if it came from a stranger is hurting me. F-ing Apple Store.

Addendum: They could not fix my airport nor my battery, but good news! They fixed my shift key! I was unable to quit using it altogether, like I threatened, due to spell check getting its panties in a twist every time I did not capatize. But now I can use it without aiming my pinky directly at the 1 milimeter dot (you think that sounds easy but it's not!) They ARE geniuses!

VSP (Very Special Pot)

This is the cutest ceramic pot ever, which was made for me as a going-away present by one of my kindergarten students, Alex Hadley. I sent it from New York in the mail because when he gave it to me, all my stuff was already enroute to SF, and I really didn't see putting it in my suitcase. I wasn't sure it would make it, but it survived! He gave it to me with a plant in it, but that plant, let's just say you can't mail plants book-rate if you want them to live. But I got a new plant today and I told him I'd put a photo of it on the blog. So here it is.

Bed-Stuy, Do or Die

So just for a minute, can we go back to Brooklyn? We lived in the "do" part of Bedford Stuyvesant. I lived there with my friends Kali and Shane, and this place was so crazy. It was a totally mint brownstone from 1880. We had two floors. It looked like some kind of a men's club, I swear. Dark wood paneling everywhere, big mirrors, stained glass every which-way. We couldn't believe we lived there. When we first walked in we were totally freaking out, it was so nice, and then we saw our Senegalese goddess tile backsplash in the kitchen (we called her Bertha) and we were all, "We have to move in here!' Anyway, I took these photos the day I moved out, so I could remember the opulence of Decatur Street. That crazy huge room with all the windows? That was my BEDROOM. I am not even kidding. Crazy.

At Last, the Garden!

The garden is completely crazy, out of charge, nuts. It's full of plants that are so large and bonkers and prehistoric, it's like Jurassic park out there. Highlights include: this crazy upside-down trumpet-flower tree; a palm tree--for real--that I hate and Evan thinks is EPIC; a giant herb garden, a giant succulent area; a real-live Japanese maple, which I have always dreamed of having; and yes, a real-live, ginourmous lemon tree, which I used one of the lemons from yesterday. And also I brought the plastirondac (yes, that's plastic-Adirondac) chair from Brooklyn, and it's the only patio furniture we have down here, but it's a start! So that's the house, people! Now you only have events to look forward to on the super-duper Hale/Becker blog!

The Garage, Continued

Look, I know you can't wait to see the garden, but don't you want to know what else is in the garage? Here's what: our sweet new ride; our washer and dryer (this is only the washer, but you get the idea), which are like the best thing that ever happened to me; a stack of gifts from Baby Center that I have to write thank you notes for (Thanks to everyone!!! Now that I have almost showed everyone the whole house, I'll have time to write!); and Evan's man-cave/shop, which we have already discussed. OK! Now you can see the garden!

The Garage/ Basement

It's not really a basement, on account of it's above-ground, but you have to go downstairs to get there, and it looks basement-y. You have to go there if you want to go to the garden, so I am showing it to you first. There is one really sad thing there. This couch. We bought it on Craigslist for $40, which I thought was a real deal! Check out it's sweet modern lines and silvery sheen! I really hitched my wagon to this couch. I really thought it was going to open up a lot of possibilities to me, decorating-wise. We paid some guy $60 to move it. Well, I bet you know the end of that story. No way was it fitting in our house, at least not in the upstairs. So now it sits in the garage and taunts me every single time I go down there. I think we should sell it, and I hope we can get a hundred bucks.

Renaissance Man

So in case you never knew, Evan's a painter and a cabinet maker, which comes in handy since he can fix most stuffs and he has a well-developed aesthetic. Here's his chalk board downs stairs and the painting we just put upstairs. Also here's some cabinets he's building for some dude in Mill Valley. Also check out his new machine. Very professional!!!

The Man of the House

OK, the main complaints about my new blog: no way to comment ( I fixed that, so comment away) and no pictures of Evan. Some accused me of making him up. Well let's venture down into the basement where he does his man work. We call it the man cave, and sometimes if we get a little cross with each other he goes there, which is the advice of famous man/woman specialist (Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus), John Gray. If I go down there to do some laundry or go to the garden or ask him to move something heavy or just generally chat him up--or take pictures for this blog--he can get distracted from his work, which is not cool, so I try to keep the interruptions to a minimum, but it's hard! Yesterday I took some pictures of him doing some man work, but it was very interrupting of me, and then I accidentally erased them, so today you'll have to settle for this one of him working on the coffee, and some of his man cave where he does his computer and keeps his millions of sneakers.

War and Peace: The Cats

The cats are tolerating each other, but not yet in love. Norma had to fly here on a plane all by herself, and I was worried she would be all traumatized, but it turns out she is just fine and ready to rule. The "Kate Moss of Kitties" is totally shredding. Norma primarily hangs out in the front of the house, even though she has basically claimed the whole house as her own. She looks sweet, but she's really not. Not if you are another cat.

Joey has been sequestered (by Norma) to the bedroom, and occasioanally Norma comes in there just to torture her. Lately, Joey has started to venture out, which really pisses Norma off.